15/12/2020
A LETTER TO 2020: MUSINGS ON YOUR LESSONSDear 2020, You will be remembered for a long time! You generated stories that we will share with our children, strengthened our social bonds, and unearthed the values that keep us ticking most authentically. 2020. I am so grateful for you and that you shifted the earth so that I was once again forced to stop, reflect and grow wilder. You have taught me many little lessons which I now want to reflect on with you. I was moving too fast through the world I love life. I am excited to roll out of bed every day, shrug off the doona and race outside to see the world awaken. I am eager for work far more days than I am not, and I get excited leaning into new projects and challenges. In previous years, travel was frequent and exciting. Missions bountiful. The tent got a great workout too. Which left the core of Hanny in a dust storm as she watched her alter ego race off into the distance. It hasn’t been until I slowed and began to spend more days and evenings at home or exploring locally here in Tasmania that I realized there were so many moments & gems that I was missing out on. 2020, I thank you for slowing me down… A little ☺ I value intimate relationships 2020, you have highlighted our social natures. ‘Virtual’ became a term even my grandmother understood! However, this increased use of technology highlighted our deepest desire for authentic, intimate connections. A candlelit dinner with my husband. A hug from Mum. Or an elderflower mojito with my father at our favourite bookstore when it reopened. 2020, I thank you for connecting me authentically. Creativity is vital! All work and no play dulled my inner sparkles. Whilst we had to lean in, I also learnt that I needed to lean out. So despite the events unfolding, I finished & published my memoir called Finding My Feet: My Story, began a new journal, and then enrolled in adult education art classes. There was no greater joy than trundling down to my local library, paint pots and brushes tucked under my arm, to paint and eat cookies with seniors twice my age. 2020, thank you for reminding me that creativity makes my sparkles shine brighter. Goals hold us accountable, dreams fuel our fires A common phrase I heard this year was, ‘I need a goal to keep me going!’ But events were cancelled, National Parks were closed and missions became harder to attain. The goals of our past – those Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Realistic and Time-locked events were hard to come by. On the other-hand, dreams weren’t! During the thick of the 2020 firestorm our house was on fire. I felt at risk of losing everything. Thankfully our community came to our rescue. So too did dreams! On the hardest days I would dream of mountain time, running wilder and afterwards diving into fresh Tasmanian waters, my tent waiting nearby to hug me. It was this dream that fueled my fire and I knew it would become a reality, my reward for leaning into the discomfort… and it did! I now prioritise dreaming wilder over goal setting. Where goals can hold me accountable, I use dreams to keep my inner fires burning brightest. 2020, I thank you for helping me realise that goals may hold me accountable but it is my dreams that fuel my fire. Experiences are invaluable Dreams alive, inner flames fueled, I frequently reflected on past experiences for added mojo. This made me realise the importance of my lived experiences, those moments when I have leaned into fear, discomfort, excitement or newness. Because these moments, such as my solo traverse of the Western Arthurs mountain range in March, or the Pyrenees Traverse in 2019, helped keep my mojo brimming. Such reflections would highlight, ‘This is what I live for!’. 2020, I thank you for reminding me to keep striving for a life that will make me jealous when I am older and greyer. Less is more 2020, despite your turmoil, I reduced my working hours. The end of my work week would approach and I recognized unproductiveness – thick thinking, languid writing, surface conversations. So, I took Wednesday as my weekly sabbatical. I roamed longer, refilled the fridge and enrolled in an art class. Now the end of my week is as productive as the beginning. 2020, I thank you for showing me that less is always more, even when I might beg to disagree. Honesty is my number one value But there were still tears! When the business was teetering and the doors were effectively closed, Graham and I sat with our Find Your Feet Team at the back of our Hobart store and cried together. Sharing the honesty of this moment with them, showing vulnerability in our emotions, knowledge and skillsets helped pull us even closer together. 2020, I thank you for reiterating the importance of honesty to anchor me to my most authentic self, and to others. Humans are not designed to live indoors We got told to stay home, remain indoors. We all rebelled and stretched every rule to its maximum for a few extra whiffs of fresh air. I found I needed it for earthing, creativity and to keep my playful spirit alive. 2020, I thank you for helping me live outdoors more and unapologetically. I cannot wait to be a mother! I had sat on the fence for a while, pondering. My husband too. We would peer into the parental unknown and wondered what it would feel like to push through the tall grass over there with a kiddo in tow. We would then look back at our past with confidence knowing, ‘yep, there was plenty of green grass to enjoy there’. But in 2020 we fell off the fence and Kiddo soon smiled back at us from the ultrasound screen. Knowing how unfair this journey can be for others, we are just so grateful for this gift and the understanding that as soon as we started walking towards parenthood it felt oh-so-right. 2020, I thank you for the blessing of approaching motherhood and I just can’t wait for the excuse to live through the eyes of a child once again. So, 2020, you were one massive, freefalling, snowball of a year! But I thank every moment, day, week and month for the lessons you have taught me, and I also thank all those who walked besides, in front or behind us, giving us added strength. May 2021 continue to consolidate, inspire and help us all find our wilder wings. Yes, 2021, I look forward to meeting you! PS. Further highlights include:
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